For a very long time, I have always realized that my energy could be affected by my environment. I used to refer to myself as a chameleon, where I would blend into my environment and adjust my temperament based on how those around me acted. But I could never understand why some days I would want to hide in solitude, while other days I craved interaction with the outside world. It’s like this constant internal battle- you don’t know what to label yourself as, nor do you understand why you can’t fit in a particular box. This past weekend, my fiance had an amazing event for the city of Tampa. It was an artist showcase that was filled with talented vendors that made up for a great networking opportunity. There was A LOT of people in attendance. My anxiety was at an ultimate high and for the first few moments, and it could be read all over my face…even though I was wearing a mask…lol I’ll explain some other time. Ultimately, I shook out the shell of shock and was bouncing around from wall to wall greeting different people I recognized. So how exactly does that happen? And why did I feel the need to isolate myself from everyone for the next few days to follow? One word- Ambiversion.

So, what is Ambiversion? Simply put, it’s a combination of introversion and extroversion. Sometimes this can be confusing to other people. I’m sure there are some people who feel that you can’t be both, but you can. There’s a spectrum that you can fall within. It’s also hard to ignore the fact that interacting with others is inevitable, especially in my type of lifestyle. Perhaps, I’ve been forced to become more extroverted. After doing some research on this topic, turns out there are several signs that might reveal you are indeed, an extroverted introvert. See if any of these apply to you:

1. One on one interactions are a lot more enjoyable than group settings. I get anxiety in a group of people, especially people I don’t know. However, put me in a one on one interaction and I will kill you with conversation. Like I won’t shut up. And I’m pretty sure that this is because an intimate setting feels less overwhelming and allows me to feel more comfortable.
2. You’re open to meeting new people but prefer an advance warning to mentally prepare for a social interaction. This is me to the core! It’s not that I don’t want to meet new people. It’s just that I get freaked out by the idea of it. I like to mentally prepare myself. I like to know what I’m about to get myself into. When I have the time to process meeting new people, I am in a much better mood when it actually happens.
3. You need a lot of alone time, but still get lonely when you have too much alone time. Yes, it’s possible lol. I like my alone time because it gives me an opportunity to recharge. But then once I’m recharged, I’m ready to get back out there again!
4. Speaking of recharging, the need to recharge happens because too much social interaction can be exhausting. I don’t understand the science behind it. All I know is that after a few days of intense social interaction, I get irritable and all I want to do is bury myself in my couch at home with Netflix. Phone off. Solitude where there’s no expectations to talk, mingle, dress up, anything!
5. It’s hard to get you out of the house but once you are, you usually have a great time. Um, yeah. More often than not, I usually have a blast. My fiance loves to rub it in my face whenever he realizes this happens…only because I give him such a hard time to go out that he practically has to fight with me and drag me out of the house. I wish I was exaggerating.

There are so many other signs that I have not touched on, but as you can see, these are not ‘all or nothing’ traits. I can be outgoing and shy. Talkative and introspective. And sometimes, my introversion hits me like a pile of bricks in a social setting. It sneaks up on me and then I am out of commission for the rest of the night. I have to nurture both sides of me and it’s definitely a learning process. If any of you relate to this, I would love to hear your input. Do you feel like you’re an extroverted introvert? Do you feel that all of this is bullshit? Whatever your stance, I would love to hear! Hope you all have an amazing day!